Friday, May 23, 2008


On the board: names for our new product
Honey 8
Bee-slobber 1

Man: Clearly, no one values honesty here!

Monday, May 19, 2008

Really Finished!

So I actually finished all the first year law work! The paper I wrote ended up being a bit like this:

If you don't know the number it is about a con man tricking a town into buying band instruments by convincing them that the opening of a pool hall will turn all their kids into hoodlums (i.e. quick get your kids into a band and off the streets1). I basically tried to do the same thing , i.e. try and sell my paper by telling everyone the federal agency involved was the devil.

I am proud of my work and feel my transformation into a used car salesman is complete (i.e. first year is done and all my pesky moral qualms are gone too).

Saturday, May 17, 2008

So Close and Yet So Far!

As mentioned below I am done with exams, but the academic year for first year law students is not quite over. Yes, first we all get to scramble to write what amounts to about a sixteen page paper in two days. Oh, and it is based on a 58 page packet of cases we get on that day. Did I mention none of this is technically for fun? Yes, based on these papers the editorial board for the law journals will be chosen, an honor we have all been brainwashed into thinking we secretly want since day one.

Now, I always have a bit more trouble sorting through cases with no human parties and just a lot of regulations that seem to have borrowed the devil's Dewey Decimal system to come up with their names. Yes, I do best when parties are human (ok I am holding out for mythical beasts, but none of those yet) and when there is a comprehensible story or at least some human elements involved for better or worse. So image the joyed I was filled with after receiving my question packet from an overly chipper helper and discovered that our question was on banking regulations. Awesome! Nothing like 50 plus pages of banking regulations you have to read and then come up with new and exciting views on them. Now, I may be as pigmentless as the monopoly man one day, but that does not mean federal banking regulation will ever occupy a warm place in my heart.

So just as I though I was out the door the icy hand of the law grabbed my ankle and pulled me back in. Accordingly, the monsoon weather we had on my free day was traded for fun in the sun weather when I had to lock myself inside and attempt to do handstand as an attempt to better understand what I was reading.

Did I mention that the reward for this is getting to argue for a year about other peoples citations? Seriously, I would accept a handful of beans. It would be a better offer. Then I would climb up mine bean stalk to the the land of the giants where all would hopefully live in a land of blessed anarchy and anyone who mentioned the law would be given in intimate role in the provision of bread for the entire giant community. And on that blissful not I shall drift off into sweet, sweet sleep.

Monday, May 12, 2008

Praise Be!

First year of law school is done!

I seriously cannot believe it

Maybe in a few days time I will have some insight

you know,

other than law school,

don't do it.

Sunday, May 11, 2008

Oh, I don't dislike Hillary THAT much

Remember when I used to have words on this here blog? Or things about me? Maybe those will return once I finish exams tomorrow and have life again/words to spare.

Saturday, May 10, 2008

Um, Yeah

If you ever wanted a ghetto summary of the Die Hard movies in Russian and set to music and then marketed as a hip hop hit...

And yes, this is one of Ukraine's most popular groups

Clearly I am studying civil procedure.

Friday, May 09, 2008

Dragons vs. Robots