Sunday, December 10, 2006

Pain

So I am drowning in work at the moment. What has been rather frustrating for me the realize in the last few years that getting work done is a mixture of three things: 1. time 2. will and 3. energy. The first two I can usually manage, but the third is always the problem. Today and yesterday I have just be exhausted, it has been really hard to get work done and when I have exercised in the gym here I have just gotten tired way too easily.

Now this is usually when my mother tries to convince me that I have mono (if that were true I would have had mono for about half a decade now) or some other such things (by thing I mean horrible disease), but I don't know. It will be rough week either way. I have two final exams and a lot of homework (mainly for French so of course it takes for ever). Then there is the fact that I will probably hear from Columbia law this week. Ugh. I can think of reasons why they should accept me and reasons why they shouldn't, but at the end of the day I just can't tell which way it will go and that has been driving me crazy, I'll just have to wait and see. There is also the added awkwardness that when I get bad news that I tend to be the type of person that likes to hide it for a bit and just not deal with it for a little while. The letter, however, is going home, and though I love my parents if everything does go poorly I will just want to deal with it on my own. Sigh, it should be an interesting week.

It is funny though. For me it is never one thing that I feel like I can't deal with but rather the barrage of all things at once. It will all be fine it is just one of the moments when I would like to fast forward through one of the overly dramatic moments of my life like a bad chick flick.

3 comments:

ruth said...

dear ian,

you sound like you need a hug. unfortunatly you are far away.

i usually manage 1 and 3 just fine, but it's the will part that's missing. i vote that you don't have mono, but rather consumption. the plus side to that is when you eventually start wasting away and approaching death, i will write you epic poetry. bad epic poetry, but epic none the less.

let me know if there's anything i can do, even if it's just listening to you yell about life for a while on skype.

love,
ruth

p.s. there is no such thing as a bad chick flick. besides, unless there's some girl i don't know about who you've screwed things up with so now you have to make an overly dramatic and romantic declaration of your love in a public place, you hardly qualify for chick flick status.

ruth said...

my friend taught me a german word today: Kummerspeck which apparently means excessive weight gain caused by emotion-related overeating. i thought of you. not because you gain excessive wieght from emontion-related overating, but because in my head german = ian

Barbarossa said...

I like consumption, it is a hell of a lot sexier than mono. Old timey and classy. The stylish way to die. I like.

I am doing better today (thanks for the kind words Riuth!), though I do really like your offer of bad epic poetry. I picture something like a hallmark card stretched over 1000 pages. Awful and yet somehow I think I would want to become an expert in it.

I checked, Kummerspeck is real and pretty awesome. I like that is literaly means "grief bacon." I also like Drachenfutter, which literaly is dragon food, but means eace offerings made by guilty husbands to their wives.

They are all from this BBC article;

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/magazine/4248494.stm

Also cool is the Russian word "koshatnik," a dealer in stolen cats.